Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I am really NOT religioust

Meaning, I do not discriminate because of religion. But this is my second post about Jehovah's witnesses. And I happened upon this thought last night when I was reading the Christmas issue of Women's Day magazine. I know, I know, it's too early to be thinking about Christmas, but I can't help it because I work retail and because all the magazines send out their Christmas issue in November! So, I was reading the section of Woman's Day where women were discussing their best Christmas ever, and one of the women was talking about how the best Christmas she ever had was when she and her husband had nothing but a small tree because they had just moved to Beijing. I thought back to my most memorable Christmas, and what came to mind was when I was living with my mom in second grade, the year that we house-sat for a rich family who was off in some hot city like Palm Springs, for the winter. I remember how she took scraps of wood and a few nails to make me a very simple box with a shelf inside, and a cross-piece to hold the shelf up. This simple box was a dollhouse. Nothing fancy, in fact, it was painted plain white, with no other markings, "left for [me] to decorate". I got a few dollar store accessories, but in truth, it wasn't really that much, and yet I was happy with it, as this American couple in China was. I started thinking about Christmas now, and how I ask for and get basic stuff, like socks, underwear, and snack foods (for study breaks), and I rely on getting that stuff at Christmas, because I am a poor college student, but those are the essentials, and I feel bad asking my parents for it because they are already contributing so much to my education, or as much as they can anyway.

So how this relates is that I had some friends when I was growing up that were practicing Jehovah's witnesses, which means, for those of you who don't know, they don't celebrate holidays. This was hard for me to understand because I was so accustomed to giving gifts for Christmas and birthdays. We were kind of on the same plane of socio-economic status so the daughter and I had a lot in common. But she had two brothers, and therefore they had less money. Thinking about it now, I depend on my parents to give me the essentials that I need for school, like paper, socks, underwear, ect. And now, I think about how neglected children in Jehovah's Witnesses families might feel. I think about how they get their essentials if their parents don't give them essentials that much..

Just a thought.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Tribute to Strings Tributes

This isn’t really deep or interesting, like I try to be when I write here, but today, something I am excited about are the strings tributes that I just got. I first heard a strings tribute in my friend’s car on the way to Lucky’s Chinese Restaurant, where we were to get orange chicken, the best in my small town, and quite possibly the world (that last statement is very typical of everyone who has ever had orange chicken, but goodness, it is true for me. Best orange chicken on the face of this earth). Who even came up with the idea for orange chicken, anyway? Who thought, hmmm… oranges and chicken. This is what I have in my refrigerator. I know, I will put them together and they will taste fantastic! PRESTO (or the Chinese word for “presto”)!
Anyway, this post is not about orange chicken and its lovely deliciousness, but about string tributes, so back to the subject. Anyway, I was riding in my friend H’s car, and this song on a mixed CD (yeah, CD. Remember those?) comes on, and it’s just violins. But after a moment of listening, I hear the faint tune of Girls Not Grey by A.F.I. so I was like, “H, A.F.I. doesn’t play stringed instruments (besides guitars and basses) do they? And she said “No, this is a string quartet tribute. Badass, huh?” “Yeah, completely,” I replied, and I just listened to it, and imagined the words there. I don’t know if any of you have ever heard the Pickin’ On series that does bluegrass covers of country songs, sans mots, but it’s kinda like that in the sense that they take rock songs, and do covers of them with a string quartet, and again, without words.
Just to give you an idea of the awesomeness that is the string tribute, I will tell you what I found: Sweet Child of Mine (Guns N Roses (if you don’t know this song, I am ashamed of you)), Money (Pink Floyd), In the End and Numb(Linkin Park), Hands Down (Dashboard Confessional (okay, I guess they do non-rock songs too)), How You Remind Me and Someday (Nickelback, and I love it. Full of badassery and amazingness), Here Without You (Three Doors Down), Dream On (Aerosmith), Clocks and Yellow (Coldplay), Wonderwall (Oasis), Bohemian Rhapsody (Queen, and you had DAMN well better know this one), Be My Escape (Relient K), Dare You to Move and This is Your Life (Switchfoot), ect. I cant go on listing them because I know you’re important and have lots of better things to do than listen to me go on about random pointless shit. So, for your pure enjoyment, I have posted a link to Bohemian Rhapsody, the string tribute to Queen, and for those poor souls who don't know the awesomeness of Queen, may God have mercy on your soul. Listen to it. Seriously.

Monday, November 16, 2009

My Experience with a Psychic.

Let's just say that it was interesting, to say the least. This evening, Alan Cable, a radio personality on a station I listen to (from far away… I listen on the internet) hosted a psychic, and apparently he does this every night and I just don't listen enough. Anyway, the point is, I was sitting here thinking, I don't have anything to ask a psychic, I don't believe in them anyway and then I thought of something. God has been calling me to India (I think) and I have been thinking a lot about it. Anyway, I decided to call in and ask this psychic if I was going to go to India within the next two years (because the next time that I would be able to go would be between now and after I graduate from college with my degree in a year and a half. Now, let me tell you, calling in is no easy feat. I had to hang up and call again SIXTY-NINE TIMES before I got through. We're talking mass busy signals. Anyway, Alan picked up and asked what I wanted to ask, and I told him my question and he puts me on hold, and before you know it, he's back on the phone with me, asking my name and my question. Here's how the conversation went:

Alan: Hi, what's your name?

Me: J.

Alan: And what is your question for Sylvia the psychic?

(is it just me, or are all psychics seemingly named Sylvia?)

Me: I was wondering if I will be going to India within the next two years.

Sylvia the Psychic: Yes. Yes, you will be going to India, and you will be meditating a lot there.

Me: Oh really? Will I be doing anything else?

Sylvia the Psychic: Yes, yes, you will be meditating a lot, and you will have a large spiritual awakening.

Alan: What are you going to India for?

Me: Oh, it's just a career choice.

Alan: Well, what do you want to do?

Me: I want to open a shelter for the homeless, using art as catharsis.

Alan: Well, you are just a great person. Have a great night!

Me: Thanks, you too. Bye.


This, if you have been following my blog, kind of follows what I want to do in India, but isn't quite the focus of what I want to do there. I won't be meditating in the most used sense of the word, and if I am meditating, I will be meditating on what God is telling me, and what I read in His word. But she didn't say anything about "bind[ing] up the brokenhearted, proclaim[ing] freedom for the captives, [or] release[ing] from darkness the prisoners." (Isaiah 61:1) She didn't say anything about the work that I would be doing there, taking children out of the brothels and slums, working creatively with them, ect. This makes me think that all it takes to be a psychic is a little general knowledge of the world and some really good guesswork that can be backed up with logic. In fact, several of the calls that I, as a listener heard her take, the person asking the question answered it his/herself. Anyway, my guess is that Sylvia the Psychic knew that India had the Taj Mahal in it, and that there are two dominate religions there, both very strong. Therefore, my situation is so specific that all she had to go on was guesstimates. So, I said thank you and hung up. But I started wondering… why do people believe and depend on psychics so much? Psychics make their money by creating self-fulfilling prophesies, meaning, they put an idea of what the person wants in person's head (because the person often asks a leading question with a yes or no answer). Because what the psychic said was what the person wanted to hear anyway, the person works harder to make what the psychic said happen, or if what the psychic said was vague, it is easy to interpret the psychic's answers the way you want to, molding them to the outcome you got or you wanted, like I did with Sylvia the Psychic's answers, therefore fulfilling the prophesy that was made, and further reinforcing your belief in the psychic. For example, a woman who wants another baby is going to try harder to have another baby if the psychic tells her she will, and she will give up, or not try as hard if the psychic tells her that she won't.

And I got to thinking, maybe people believe in psychics because they need something to believe in to be secure with themselves in the world. Maybe it just makes them feel better, knowing what is coming. But while I was thinking this, I was also thinking that atheists say the same thing about people of religion. We're just two different groups of people. Psychics and their followers have psychic books as their Bible, and they have self-fulfilling prophesies as their miracles, and they depend on what will happen in this world instead of what is promised for the next world, where as Christians follow a God that is not of this world, we have a sacred text, miracles like the one I witnessed (a girl's knees were healed by God through a group of people), and we depend on what is promised for us in the next world and live by a code. I've often wondered if we're all worshipping bastardized versions of the same God, imposing our own prejudices on our religion, making the differences between religions. Maybe this is sacrilege, but it's a theory.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

I am very much a socialist.

I had a big long rant about this all typed out, then my computer restarted itself, and it was therefore deleted before I could post it. I can't bring myself to type another one, because I know that it wont be nearly as good as the last one. So, I am going to post a website explaining why I am a socialist and just suffice to say my most important point. Being homeless induces a cycle: Homeless = no access to showers on a daily basis = not clean and dirty clothes = bad first impression when applying for jobs = no interview = no job, and the cycle repeats. These people also have to worry about finding food on a daily basis, and I know when I spent the night homeless and had to find food the next day, it took me the majority of the day just walking from the yard I slept in to the hospitality kitchen and back to the house I was staying in for this service project. Anyway, here's the website.
Thanks for reading, yo.

Thursday, November 05, 2009

Back into the Shell

I am a turtle.

I can feel myself being pulled back into the shell that is my body.

To steal another's words,

I'm not in a good place right now.

I don't care about class.

I'm not hungry,

But I eat because my headache doesn't go away if I don't.

All I want to do is sleep.

I am a turtle,

With no control over my withdrawal,

And my shell is so uncomfortable when all my limbs are inside.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009


It feels like your life's crashing down all around you
Let me ask if it's really so bad
Look at the world in it's suffering
Can you honestly tell me that know one else could understand
All of the hurting inside

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes just simply another perspective away
Who could you be if your lens was changed for a moment,
Would you still be the same

A young child looks through a great stained glass window
Watching the people go by
Everyone seems to be wearing a red coat
His mother sees jackets in white
Now he can't understand why does she see it this way

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes just simply another perspective away
Who could you be if your lens was changed for a moment,
Would you still be the same

Yesterday, you really couldn't see
By changing your angle a new world would be
Revealed to your once blinded eyes by moving a few degrees

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes just simply another perspective away
Who could you be if your lens was changed for a moment,
Would you still be the same



This is how I feel right now..
"Because it is my name! Because I cannot have another in my life!...How may I live without my name? I have given you my soul; leave me my name!"